I feel aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaabsolutely fabulous

I have felt pain, blackouts, crisis, resignation, was stoned, euphoric and apathetic and last but not least feel every day why people can die with this illness. But now I just feel fabulous! And I enjoy. I called Tristan to ask if this came from the new medics. He said no, impossible, too early. I don't give a shit. I think this must be how healthy people feel. Or even better.

Ironically I told just a few hours back to Jih-Ming that I had to go home because I had a pain attack - and quite an ugly one. I had taken the emergency pill already last night, so taking it tonight would have been a bit risky (it can easily turn people addicted). But this problem has been solved it seems. I will feel like this again soon, I hope. I will feel like dying in between, but now I enjoy.